Internet Info 1994 March/Internet Info CD-ROM (Walnut Creek) (March 1994).iso/answers/news/howard-stern

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From: [e-mail] (Nick Simicich)
Subject: [alt.fan.howard-stern] FAQ: Frequently Asked Questions about Howard Stern, Monthly Posting
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Date: Tue, 1 Feb 1994 10:10:31 GMT
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Archive-name: howard-stern/faq

The following is a major revision of the Howard Stern FAQ.  Last
revisions on 1-1-94.  I'd like to find a keeper for the station list.

This newsgroup was formed so that fans of Howard Stern can discuss the
happenings on the show, the comings and goings, and other activities
of Howard Stern.  Some folks don't like Howard Stern.  We know that.
You don't have to take time out of your busy schedule to tell us that.
The answer here is the same as Howard's answer: If you don't like it,
turn the dial, switch bands, change the station, find another
newsgroup.  In particular, we recognize that there are many tastes and
many other radio personalities.  If you have a personality you really
like, do what I did with Howard: Start a fan group for them.  Leave us
out of it.

Frequently asked questions about Howard Stern:

1.  Who is Howard Stern?  (Frequently heard from NONUS folks.)
1a. Howard Stern is a radio personality.  He came to national
    attention in the USA while working in New York, and currently
    resides there.  He also had a syndicated TV show, and an interview
    show on the E Network (a US Based cable channel).  He is
    frequently labeled a 'shock jock'.  Your immediate thought might
    be, "Oh, like xxxxxx (insert name of local shock jock in wherever
    you are)."  No, xxxxxx is like Howard Stern.  He has been around
    for years, he is well known, and chances are that this week xxxxxx
    is doing whatever Howard was doing last week.  If xxxxxx has the
    balls.  And more and more people, throughout the country, are
    finding this out.

2.  What station does Howard Stern's TV show play on in my area? Or, I
    heard that Howard's show was cancelled.  Is it true?
2a. Howard's original TV show is in reruns, or off of the air.
    Depending on who you listen to, it was cancelled, or Howard quit.
    I personally believe (and heard this version, once, on-the-air)
    that WWOR Channel 9 wanted Howard to do it for the same money he
    got the prior year, and Howard wanted a bigger budget and more
    money.  Channel 9 folks decided that they couldn't give Howard
    more money *and* make any money on the show, they wanted to cut
    the budget.  So Channel 9 executives wanted to put themselves in a
    good light by claiming that they fired Howard and made such an
    announcement.

    If you get the E Network on cable or satellite, you should now be
    able to get Howard's new talk show.  Unfortunately, I don't.
    Howard's contract with E is up, and there may be no new shows.

3.  No, I can't take it.  I have to have Howard on my TV.  Is there
    any way?
3a. No, other than the E show.  But Howard has announced a PPV for New
    Year's Eve.  He is currently interviewing women for a $50,000 top
    prize beauty and 'talent' contest.  (This is now over.  But there
    will be either bootleg or official video tapes.)

4.  Where can Howard be received on the Radio?
4a. Currently, he broadcasts, daily, from WXRK, K-Rock, 92.3 FM from
    New York City.  This signal is good enough to cover most of New
    York City and the surrounding areas.  This signal is simulcast in
    Philadelphia (WYSP-FM, 94.1), Baltimore (on WJFK-AM 1300), and
    Washington, DC (WJFK-FM, 106.7 FM), and is simulcast in LA and
    then rebroadcast on tape delay when morning drive starts.  The LA
    times and frequency are: 97.1 FM KLSX from 3 to 6am live, and then
    tape delayed from 6 to 11am.  The LA rebroadcast is extra long
    because they insert (yech) traffic reports and local stuff.

    Howard's show is still spreading.  He is in Las Vegas, Cleveland
    (WNCX 98.5), Dallas (KEGL, 97.1), and Chicago (but no longer).
    There is also 103.9 FM (Q104) in Albany, and Rochester, NY.
    Howard claims that many more stations would carry him but for the
    FCC's vendetta against him.

    WWKB from Buffalo, NY (1520 AM) carries Howard starting at 6 AM
    Eastern Time.  This is a 50,000 Watt clear channel station, and
    reception reports seem good.  In the winter, look for him there.

    Howard is on in New Orleans, on station WRNO-FM at 99.5.

    In Boston, Howard is on 104.1 WCBN from 7 PM to 11 PM (do they cut
    the show off after four hours?)

    The latest addition is El Paso.

    Howard is not on shortwave unless someone is pirating his stuff.
    AM is Medium Wave (MW) for you nonus folks.  I'm not very good at
    keeping this list up to date, and if someone else wanted to post a
    radio list, I'd appreciate it.

    Finally, you may be able to get Howard on cable.  Several of these
    stations have satellite uplinks (including WXRK) and your cable
    company may rebroadcast them on the FM band, perhaps at a
    different frequency.  I understand, for example, that in San
    Diego, Daniel's Cablevision reboradcasts the LA station that
    carries Howard at 98.5.  Consult your cable company for
    information about hooking your FM receiver to your cable.

5.  I'm not in any of those places.  Is there a satellite feed for
    WXRK?
5a. No, WXRK used to be broadcast by SCPC on Hughes Galaxy 2 channel
    03, at about 57.5, according to Mark Geyman.  I'm told, on GEnie,
    that WXRK's uplink is now in digital form, and can't be received
    as SCPC anymore.  Can anyone confirm this?...This has been
    confirmed.  If someone can tell me how this digital feed might be
    decodable, I'd be greatly indebted.

6.  How can one be expected to figure out who is who among the
    regulars on the show?
6a. Listen for a while.  Want to take a shortcut?  Here is an effort
    to explain:

    Howard Stern - The head of the asylum.  The ruler of the roost,
    the King on NY Radio, and All Media, and other points.

    Robin Quivers - Howard's sidekick.  Officially his news reporter,
    she is also the confidant and instigator in many cases, and also
    (occasionally) feeds him lines from the privacy of her news
    studio.  Her news reports normally consist of reading the paper,
    and a few things that are put together by her interns.  None the
    less, the news reports are frequently the most entertaining part
    of the show, as Howard comments on everything.

    Fred Norris, King of Mars - Fred handles sound effects (paints)
    and also keeps the show on schedule.  When Howard started
    broadcasting in NY, frequently he would just push off the
    commercials for an hour.  Now that they are syndicated, he has to
    take breaks at regular intervals.  Fred cracks the whip.  He is on
    the writing team.  Fred also does voices for the occasional (these
    days) radio 'movie' and as the Nazi in the 'Guess who's the Jew'
    bits.   Fred also does song parodies, and is a reasonably talented
    musician.

    Jackie (The Jokeman, Penthouse Jokepage) Martling - Jackie is a
    comic who never quite made it big, notably because his standup
    isn't very good IMHO.  He writes full time for the Howard Stern
    show, and makes a fair bit of money doing local appearances as
    well, pushed by plugs from the show.  One wonders when he sleeps.
    Maybe during the show.  +1 516 922 WINE gets you a schedule of his
    upcoming appearances, and it is a normal toll call (no 900 style
    surcharge) but has a few ads, and a few jokes.  There is more than
    30 minutes of material on the new all-digital line.  He is also on
    the writing team, as the head writer.  Jackie gets two plugs a
    day, by contract.

    Gary (Baba Booey) Dell'Abate - The show's producer.  He
    arranges guests, insures that the office part of the show gets
    done, and so forth.  For those of you who've read Gulliver, he is
    also Howard's chief flapper - he is generally the one who makes
    the judgment as to whether or not someone speaks to Howard when
    they call up with a beef.  He is called Baba Booey after his
    mispronunciation of Baba Looey, Quick Draw McGraw's sidekick on
    the Hanna-Barbera cartoon show.  He was buying animation cels,
    and didn't know how to pronounce the name of the character,
    despite professing fandom.  Gary does occasional personal
    appearances, for which he gets plugs.  Gary has recently married.
    Despite predictions, some of them mine, he is still Baba Booey.
    He was making noise about registering Bababooey as a trademark
    recently.  He is famous for the 'repeat after me' bit.  These
    days, he is also 'Fa-fa'fooey, sa-sa-smelley, and so forth.

    John (Stuttering John) Melandez - Hero of the stupid.  He was a
    paid performer on Channel 9, officially on WXRK he is just an
    intern.  He is paid in notoriety [supposedly he is now getting a
    salary] (he gets to plug his band appearances and occasional
    personal appearances, and has gotten a record contract because of
    his connections.  John has been signed by Atlantic Records). and
    is typically sent out to interview celebrities.  The questions are
    all prepared, but sometimes he gets to adlib.

    Scott the Engineer - mixes tapes, inserts the bleeps so that you
    can still hear the cursing in the background, and is hapless when
    it comes to fixing the console.  He is employed by WXRK as Chief
    Engineer, and he is in the Union.  He is making additional money
    because he gets a daily plug, which he has used to build up a DJ
    business.  He has a number of DJ's who work for him and provide
    canned music for parties, weddings (Gary was married and used
    Scott's service, Rocket Entertainment) and so forth.  This is
    good, because Scott smokes like a chimney and I wouldn't want him
    at one of my parties.

    Gorilla (Gorillo, but they call him Gorilla on the show) is an
    intern who wants to be a radio personality someday, but who first
    needs to learn how to talk in English.

    We almost never hear about Robin's news interns.

    Billy West, the voice of Ren and Stimpy, occasionally performs on
    Howard's show, doing various voices.  I believe, for example, that
    he did Marge Shott (see the sound archive) and does 'Red'.

7.  How can you listen to someone who is as racist/homophobic/anti
    woman/etc. as Howard Stern?
7a. You just don't get it, do you?  Howard is none of those things, in
    spades: He is an equal opportunity denigrator.  Sooner or later he
    will kick one of your sacred cows in the balls, to mix metaphors
    in an udderly improbable manner.  But he is still very funny.
    Someone on this newsgroup once said that a lot of Howard's humor
    comes from the sort of attitude that says, "Look at all of this
    crap in the world around us!  Isn't it wierd?  Isn't it funny?
    Sit in our circle and we'll let you in on the joke."  Well, some
    of us think that we get the joke.

8.  Is Howard Stern half Jewish?
8a. Definitely.  The question is, what is the other half?  We have to
    differentiate between the persona that Howard plays on the radio,
    and the real Howard.

    According to Howard's radio persona, it is not Jewish, perhaps
    WASP.  The half-Jewish identity may be something that Howard puts
    on so that he can insult both Christians and Jews with impunity.
    However, he is equally free with insults of Muslims, Hindus, etc.
    It may also be something that he does to avoid anti-semitism.

    Some folks on the net believe that the other half is Italian,
    based on something that Howard said a while back.  Others point
    out that you can be a Jewish Italian, so this may have been
    another joke.  The Jewish half and the Italian half may well be
    the same half.

    It is pretty clear based on statements that Howard's sister made
    on the radio that Howard, in Real Life(tm), is Jewish.  Also,
    Howard has recently admitted, on the air, that he is all Jewish,
    and claimed that he was half Jewish to avoid anti-Semitism.

9.  I want to write to Howard and tell him (what a dickhead | how
    wonderful) he is.  What is the address?
9a. His address is:
    The Howard Stern Show
    600 Madison Avenue
    New York, NY 10016

    Particularly vehement and stupid hate letters are likely to
    get read on the air.  Clueless ones well may earn a phone call.

    If you really can't wait, fax him at (212) 759-KFAX.

10. How do I get a copy of "Crucified by the FCC"?  I called
    1-800-52-STERN, and they didn't have a clue.

10a.They never had a clue, but at one time they could take orders for
    the album.  The album hasn't been for sale for quite a while, and
    is now a "collector's item".  This just goes to prove that you
    should always buy every Howard Stern premium offered, immediately.
    The 1-800-52-STERN was in use for Butt Bongo Fiesta, and is now
    out of service, but expect it to be revived soon for New Year's
    Rotten Eve or whatever.

11. I don't get enough bababooey in the morning.  I want my computer
    to say 'bababooie' instead of beeping at me.  I have a
    Mac/Amiga/Soundblaster/NeXT box that can talk, and I want it to
    talk.

11a.This (alt.fan.howard-stern) is not in the binaries hierarchy.  Of
    course, you can post anything you want.  If various sysops notice
    that this group has become a binaries group, they will treat it
    like one, and those connected by phone line or concerned about
    disk space may not carry it.  As a hint: If your sysop does not
    carry the alt.binaries tree, they are unlikely to carry this group
    if it begins carrying binaries.

    Jeremy A. Moskowitz <[e-mail]> has been doing some
    digitizing, not only of soundbytes, but of whole songs.  These are
    digitized into Amiga .iff format at 11047 samples/sec.  If you are
    on one of these other systems, you will need to figure out how to
    convert the sounds to, say, .wav format if you want to play it
    with the Microsoft Windows multi-media program.  If you are
    interested in same, I'd like to refer you to the
    alt.binaries.sounds.misc FAQ, (may also be available in
    news.answers) which seems to cover this stuff fairly well.
    Briefly, they recommend sox, which you can get on
    wuarchive.wustl.edu.  Or use your nearby archie server.
    (I was able to convert the sounds to .wav format by
    entering the command
    find . -name *.iff -exec sox -r 11047 {} {}.wav \;
    and I got oddly named .wav files that would play on my Linux
    box.)
    Jeremy puts the sounds onto the wuarchive.wustl.edu system in
    directory /systems/amiga/boing/audio/samples/howardstern, which seems
    like a heck of a good place.  The howard.list file describes
    the samples.

    If you do want to post digitized soundbytes, please post them to
    alt.binaries.sounds.misc, or alt.sex.sounds, as appropriate, and
    post here saying that you've done so, and other things about the
    sounds, like maybe what the message ids are or when you posted
    them, or how many parts.  Anything seems to go there.  I've seen
    whole songs posted there in 41 parts.

    Also, Harry has made Stern fans a generous offer.  His words:

    In honor of Howard, I'm willing to offer up my machine as a
    central ftp site for Howard-related items. I'll put the stuff in:

        krishna.cs.umd.edu:pub/stern

    This should provide a more permanent repository than uunet's /tmp.
    I've copied these images here to start things off. I encourage all
    the Stern fans out there to add stuff to this collection. In
    particular, I would like to collect sound bites (like
    "fafafoohee", or Jackie's "tragic news item" laugh, for instance)
    and I'd like to see some gifs scanned in from his book, or maybe
    frames grabbed from Butt Bongo (though the quality on these images
    tends to suck).

    If you have something to download to ftp, send me email and I'll
    tell you how to do this. You won't be able to drop things off
    directly, I'll have to tell you where to put them (to keep the
    world at random from dumping on me).

    This will last as long as it doesn't become a problem. I'd
    appreciate it if you waited until the evening or early morning
    (East Coast time) to get stuff, but unless this becomes a problem
    I'm not going to worry about it too much.
   -harry
   ---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Spoken: Harry Mantakos   Domain: [e-mail]      UUCP: uunet!mimsy!harry
Phone: [phone]      USPS: U of Maryland, CS Dept., College Park, MD 20742


    Harry already has the soundbytes above and a couple of .gifs, and
    a copy of sox to convert sounds to different formats.

12. I can't believe it.  Do people really strip naked in Howard's
    studio, or is it a put on?  Is it theatre of the mind, or is it
    really happening?

12a.According to Mark Levy, yes they do.  And I have it on good
    authority that Howard drinks Poland Spring water (Take that,
    Georgia!).

    Additionally, if you can get a copy of the New Year's Eve Pageant,
    there was a fair amount of 'getting naked in the studio' footage
    there.

    I believe that some percentage of the folks who call in are bogus,
    but they are putting Howard on at the same time they are putting
    us on.

13. Why is is when Howard says mini-system in that ad, that everyone
    responds (exaggerating mini-).

13a.A number of years ago, there was a comedian who regularly appeared
    on the Howard Stern radio show called Crazy Jerry, who used to do
    'impersonations' in a flat voice, the most famous of which is,
    "This is Mother Theresa speaking from the bed.  God don't want me
    yet, man, I got more feet to taste."  Crazy Jerry brought in a
    'mentally challenged' girl who had a speech impediment who used to
    do the 'gina dance' (figure it out) and, when she quit appearing,
    brought in a guy who did the 'peepee dance'.  I suspect, from
    things alluded to by Howard, that he has agreed not to replay any
    of those shows, since he was convinced that the girl, especially,
    didn't really want to do this stuff, but was convinced by Jerry
    although she wasn't competent to make the decision.

    The mini-skirt, gina dance, peepee dance, and "I love you, Jerry,"
    all came from this response stuff that was done between Crazy
    Jerry and his sidekicks.


    (Note that this is my memory talking.  There is another version of
    this story in another faq which the author claims to have tape
    backup for, so they are likely right.  I still like my version
    better.  Here is the other version, verbatim:)

Q. What do you know about Gina (rhymes with Carolina) Girl?
A. In  late 1988 this woman called up Howard saying she loves him and
        she does the 'Gina dance. Howard sensed quickly that this
        woman was a little "off" and he asked her if so- she said she's
        not retarded, just "slow".  She came down to the studio with
        Crazy Jerry, who was not her boyfriend but more of a companion.
        Well she did the Gina dance, laying down naked on the floor,
        but almost no one really saw it - Howard and even Jackie
        averted their eyes because she was too heavy to be appealing.
        About that time Rain Man had been a hit movie, so Howard called
        up Gina Girl again and got her to say some lines for his new
        radio movie "China Girl," starring out of the closet Stern.
        It was in this movie that she uttered the words made famous,
        "mini-dress" (usually at the same time as saying "naked dance")
        Howard was trying to fix up Steve Rossi and Gina Gina Girl but I
        don't think it ever happened.
        I have this all on tape and that's why I can give you this detail.

        All the attribution I have on this is: testnet![e-mail]

14. What about Howard's book?  Is it any good?  Can I get mine signed?

14a.Yes, Howard Stern has a book out, called "Howard Stern's Private
    Parts".  IMHO, and in the opinion of a number of reviewers, it is
    actually a worthwhile piece of literature.  As I write this, it
    completes its second week as #1 on the New York Times best seller
    list, entering the list at #1.  Howard says that he wrote it, but
    he freely gives credit to a collaborator (an essay about this
    appears in the book) and to his editor (who moved into his house).
    There is no doubt that this is a collective effort and I believe
    that, unlike some celebrity books, Howard did a significant amount
    of work on the book personally, using the professionals to help
    him plan and polish.  I believe that it was a successful effort as
    well.

    There were a number of book signings.  It looks like there will be
    no more.  Howard attracted a record number of people to his Wall
    Street, NY signing (where I got mine signed, and was on FOX 5 news
    that night having it signed), and signed a record number of books,
    the previous record being held by Mohammed Ali, the boxer.  The
    problem was that the crowd was too hard to manage (according to
    the police), and the police wouldn't let him sign for as long as
    he needed to.  It sounds like a new record was set in LA.  8000
    books.

    Personally, if I hadn't had mine signed, I'd mail it to the show,
    with a pleading letter, and a check for $25 (since that was what
    he offered a signature to the paraplegic from Cleveland for) as
    well as a self-addressed, postage paid mailer.  At best, they will
    sign it and send it back, and at worst they will keep it (which is
    what they threatened to do when they still thought that they could
    have managable book signings) and you'll have to buy another copy.

    Do not confuse this with the paperback book titled Howard Stern,
    Big Mouth, by Jeff Menell.  Make up your own mind, but IMHO, this
    isn't worth wasting your money on.

15. I'm looking for a BBS related to Howard Stern.

15a.Dimnah BBS [phone] has the Washington area's "only Howard Stern
    conference.  Also includes a Howard Stern fanclub.  .gifs and .bmps are
    available through the users."

    Also, Off Our Rockers BBS [phone].  Please download some
    gifs, according to one poster.

16. What about all these other FAQs I see here?

16a.I think they are a great idea.  More power to them.  Between all
    of the FAQs, we'll get the Stern info to the masses. :-) If any
    other FAQ owners want to cross post to the answers group, I'll
    restructure this one so that it goes in a subdir and there is room
    for everyone.
--
Nick Simicich - uunet!bywater!scifi!njs - [e-mail]
SSI #AOWI 3958, HSA 318, NAUI #14065, PSI #3286